Healthy self-esteem is based on a clear understanding of who you are and what you have to offer the world. Does that make sense to you? If so, think about what informs your understanding. I suggest there are two directions from which that information might come: inside you and outside you. On the inside you are filled with memories, impressions, beliefs, etc. which prompt you to talk to yourself in specific ways. Yes, talk to yourself. Not surprisingly we call this “self-talk.” Self-talk can be negative (typically unhealthy) or positive (usually healthy). So what have you been saying about yourself to yourself lately? Whatever that is, it powerfully impacts your self-esteem.
On the other hand, there is the information that comes from the outside–from other people (some who matter a great deal to you and some who are strangers or barely acquaintances), from the media and from things you read. Interesting implications to all that, just one of which is: how much do you want to be influenced by people whom you do not know? (I do see the irony here since that may include me!)
I will be posting more about this topic soon. In the meantime, I would love to hear from you about what influences your self-esteem on any given day.
Every day you get to choose your opinion of yourself–whether you will have healthy self-esteem or low self-esteem. To whom are you listening today?
Negative self talk sometimes comes to me in the form of reminding myself of past failures and using them to define who I am. It certainly isn’t God who is beating me over the head with the past. I was reading in Psalm 103 how God removes our transgressions “as far as the east is from the west.” God has provided forgiveness so I don’t have to keep treating the past like a yoyo–cast away and then pulled right back by the invisible string of memory for self condemnation.
Thank you for your comment. I really resonate with your analogy of the yoyo and the invisible string–powerful!